The First Day of Summer

and it's also International Surfing Day

If you have been on the net at all you know that as part of the celebration Jim Moriarty (head of Surfriders) has even offered to write a note to your boss explaining why he should let you go surf today.

That's nice, but except in a very few organizations it goes directly against the grain of the primary corporate mandate  "extracting the most profit from our commercial activities while sucking the very life out of our employees"

So what do you do?

You call up your boss and in the grand tradition of workers everywhere and you lie!

To help you out I have compiled a list of excuses that should get you a few days off this week.

1 - My pet goldfish passed away and it was his last wish was to be buried at sea
      If you work at PETA this is gonna work, trust me!

2 - The Doctor suggest that I need to visit the ocean “for the waters”
      If you boss is a Bogart fan, you are in.

3 - I got a bad case of 3 day leprosy
      By the time they get over the squeamish factor you're back
      (This really works good if you are planning a trip to Molokai.)

4 - Map Quest is down and I have forgotten how to get to the office
      If you are an unrepentant geek with a poor sense of direction this one has to work

5 - I use the Mayan calendar and the world ends in 2012, so why bother
      If you boss has seen the movie or heard the buzz this one should work

6 - In my religion, the Aleutian Juice days are holy and the swells must be observed
      I'm sure the ACLU will back you up on this one.  Maybe Gloria Allred too.

7 - I over dosed on Viagra over the weekend and I need to wait until the swelling goes down.
      Trust me, they don't want you in the office until the condition clears up

8 - There is a Star Trek / Star Wars marathon on and I’m not going anywhere! Make it so Number One!
      This works great, but if your boss is a Star Trek or Star Wars fan he or she will want to go with you.

9 - Prana Glider say I could have the day off!
      If this one works let me know.


Piskian said…
Ironically,I have the day off but it's flat here!Still,the flattest day off is better than the best workday,or something.
And I'm not sure if what I do on the mat is even called's way more fun.
pranaglider said…
Piskian, Yes any day anywhere is better than any day at work. Wave sliding is the new black
Brine Time said…
Always entertaining. I did like #9 and suggest:
The voices are telling me to get to the sea.
I'm networking with some innovative guys on some secret brine based technology.
I'm spying our key competitors and market demographic.

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